Got into a huge fight . Full Special Here -

Shows .Vegas, July 10th .Salt Lake City, July 11th & 12th .W/ the Yodeling Boy, Joe Pera.

Yall r sleepin on smoking some indica and watching Meet The Fockers on Amazon prime while drinking some water.

I fuck with @Tubi. Love the ads too.

In 2020 during the pandemic I rolled around NY with a speaker and did stand up for people who did not ask me to do stand up. The full special is now on YouTube.

Played Cousins by Ye at my boys baby shower and some of the women did not like that. I’ll admit it was a bad move by me and I’m gonna be more thoughtful about where I play Cousins going forward.

2025 Nissan Sentra

Damn. Me and the Stranger Things kids are old now. I was 14 years old when season 1 came out.

Me and my boys literally do 300 open mics a year.

Sheesh. Accidentally busted @elonmusk azz on his own app. Sorry, Elon ur the 🐐. 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

It blows my mind that baristas have time to make the little heart on top of our cappuccinos with all the hate going on in the world. 🥹.

RT @pi_fyi: Carmen Christopher (@carmchristopher) on…. 🏖️The Beach, 🐻 The Chicago Bears, 🍚Homemade Rice Krispie Treats, and more. https:/….

Does anyone know if Pennywise runs their own socials? I’m DMing but not hearing back….

We need more rock bands singing about the threat of AI in the way they used to make songs about Vietnam.

It’s 3:30 A.M. I’m in front of my agents house in Beverly Hills, going to wake his family up and rip him a new asshole for not getting me a role in the Glengarry Glen Ross play on Broadway.

I’m literally shaking in excitement right now. I just cracked a new comedic take on the difference between the Johnson and Johnson and Pfizer vaccines.

RT @cchaseno: “best part about being a guy is you can drink 12 beers and still drive home safe”.

I can’t get shit done cuz the internet is too bussin.

When the boys of Aerosmith pass away this country is fucked.

Dyson is doing some really cool shit.