I got sacked from my job at B&Q for having a paint fight...... They dismissed me for gloss misconduct.......🙄 Morning all 👋

🎶 “I was so upset that I cried all the way to the chip shop….” - great lyrics from Jilted John - 1977 🤘 🎶

🎶 Christmas time…. 🙄🎶

Cliff Richard is still getting online abuse....... He’s got himself some spying, talking, tweeting, stalking, living trolls......🙄

Just rang Argos to see if they had the game 'Operation' in stock . Apparently there's a two year waiting list.

Trees up finally 🎄

I've only got three records in my collection, two by Meatloaf and one by Michael Jackson. So two out of three ain't Bad……🙄

Love to Terry. Love to his family and friends. Love to his fans. I miss him.

I met Bonnie Tyler once…. She said “shall we go for a coffee”? I said “Starbucks”, she said no. I said “Costa”, she said no. I think she was holding out for a Nero 🙄 Morning all 👋

Happy Birthday Tommy Steele, BOTD in Bermondsey, Sarf East London in 1936 Good reason for a cockney singalong, here’s ‘Flash Bang Wallop’ https://t.co/gSsxjT1zDS via @YouTube

If you're here for Sundays yodelling lesson, please form an orderly orderly orderly orderly queue…..🙄

My dog only responds to commands in Catalan.. He's Espanyol.......🙄

🤣

My ex girlfriend said, "I can think of 14 reasons to leave you, plus your obsession with Tennis." I replied, "That's 15 love."….🙄

It’s a little known fact that there is a patron Saint of checking bread rolls as they come out of the oven…. Saint John The Bap Test 🙄 Morning all 👋

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I met Phil Spector's brother Crispin the other day... ...He’s head of quality control at Walkers....🙄

My mate works as a back doctor in Egypt He's a Cairopractor……..🙄 Afternoon all 👋

Just seen a sign "Turkey £29" in the butchers window... ...That's £400 cheaper than Tui 🙄……… Morning all 👋

My dog only lives with me on the weekends. During the week he sleeps at school. He's a Border Collie………🙄 Morning all 👋