curtis lumber
@BoronTheFloor
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this video is awesome because he’s doing a really bad job
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incorrect. he gets fat before christmas through magic and therefore the snacks are immaterial to his weight. absolute buffoon post by a fundamentally unserious thinker. ten year old’s idea of what a smart guy would say
If people left carrots, celery, & hot tea for Santa on the table instead of milk & cookies, I bet he’d be much, much thinner.
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possibly the most psychotic thing anyone does in all of seinfeld is when kramer goes into jerry's fridge and pulls out an uncovered plate with a full sandwich and chips on it
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you don't see husbands sitting down to a big plate of bacon and eggs for breakfast only to have it taken from under them and replaced by a bowl of cottage cheese with a slice of pineapple on top anymore
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i am in charge of making the amazon lord of the rings show look like that. do you guys think i did a good job
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the only really annoying thing about the EEAAO discourse is the idea that people who didn’t like it couldn’t relate to the intricacies of the immigrant family dynamic. that was the only stuff that was good imo. the hot dog fingers shit was a giant chore that sucked to watch!
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my normally immaculately curated instagram reel feed (turkish alpha/success mindset videos, cats from thailand/korea, dumb guy peaky blinder content) is like 50% this shit now despite having never indicated in any form that i'm interested in this case in the slightest
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i think it would be really funny if after the past 2-3 years of breathless and hyperbolic reappraisal of the original the new avatar movie just sucks absolute shit
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if you think all wes anderson films are the same you have the analytical skills of a baby
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got the booster. gonna get drunk and go to a rural applebees to really see what this baby can do
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the masked singer is deeply alienating to me because i cannot imagine what about it would be entertaining to anyone. i cannot understand why someone would want to watch it
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the 17 game season has fucked my understandings of how good the various records are. wtf is an 11-6 team? are they a better 10-6 team or a worse 11-5 team? these are very different things
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whoever said NBA fans treat this rapist like he’s a make a wish kid was on the money
As NBA fans, I think we can all agree that we want to witness this moment of D-Rose before he retires.
Rose deserves it 🙏🏽
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made the phantom thread breakfast this morning and good god reynoldss woodcock cholesterol must have been catastrophic. this man’s macros were a disaster
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i still get yelled at for this. best reply was just “silence hetero!”
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if i smoke weed and drink too much i start to see witcher UI elements over the heads of everyone i pass by outside. shady individual, merchant, elf etc.
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the houthi military is following roughly the same level of power creep as the first 5-7 years of GTA online. expect them to have access to the oppressor mk2 within 6-10 months
29/ More close-up photos of the Houthi F-5's camo pattern.
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one time in high school i got a ride home from something from one of my black friends' parents and rush was on in the car. a few days later i asked my friend about it later and he was like "he does that whenever white people ride with us i think he thinks you guys all like it"
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what do you think casual means
Jackie Bradley Jr. causally throwing a ball over the center field wall 🚀
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@therealaaronk
@coopercooperco
jeff personally told me to make all of the actors look like skyrim characters with randomized sliders and hes very happy with what i came up with
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it becomes more and more likely with each passing hour
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getting behind the wheel of a motor vehicle or operating heavy machinery 👍
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got my shit sucked 👍
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i actually think something like this should be grounds for impeachment. best case he fucking forgot whatever he was briefed on a few hours before and worst case he openly lied to get people killed. either way he's fucking incapable and needs to go
BREAKING: White House spokesman says US officials have not seen or confirmed pictures of atrocities in Israel, saying President Biden based his comments regarding beheaded children on Israeli statements and media reports.
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if i ever get a job again im either gonna buy the herman miller gaming chair or a vintage telephone bench
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fyi if you jump into the weird texture on the wall in the hallway next to security at JFK terminal 5 you can clip into the concourse without going through security. saves a ton of time if you’re flying jetblue
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@markthealt
this would have been one of my favorite movies of the year if it didnt make me engage with a bunch of epic butt plug jokes to get to the emotional climax
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buhhhh i dont care about your horoscope what's your starting word in wordle???
like and rt please this could be a 40k rt if it was by one of those dogshit vague affirmations only style accounts on here. i need top also
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running???
Aaron Rodgers running to grab his AR-15 with a handful of burning sage right now and frantically texting Rogan “IT’S ON”
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if artie bucco was real he would be a little too into phoebe bridgers
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@TheShweeb
@electricbeef
@coopercooperco
they could have saved a bunch of money and made the audience a lot happier by just playing a spotify playlist of various video game soundtracks
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trump was a low average home run hitter a up until a few years ago but he hasn’t had the power in years. liz warren husband post his last great one
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the only infuriating thing in this article is that apparently a single M&M is called a "lentil" ??????? what the fuck
M&M characters redesigned for a "more dynamic, progressive world," Mars announces
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@coopercooperco
ah, surely the x dot com’s video player is functional and not a big filled mess right?
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remember when giannis leg bent the complete wrong way like two weeks ago
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@sahilkapur
@RepJeffries
israel is one of the most explicitly and proudly racist states i the world 👍
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no i’m 30
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just paid eight dollars including tip for three beers in kalamazoo michigan
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oh a sporps was happening??? i wouldn’t know i was busy watching some gay little films
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@craigbased
sometimes ill look back on the proofs and stuff i used to write and think about how they were made by a totally different guy
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things that do not give you bad guy points in rdr2: burning down a mansion full of people
things that do give you bad guy points in rdr2: defending yourself from people attacking you bc you burned down a mansion full of people
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you don’t really see sexy blonde women tying a knot in a cherry stem with their tongues anymore huh? what happened with that
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how are you, as a man, following the order of operations???
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my longest "what did he mean by this" ever
very cool thing my brain did where it makes up a woman i hit it off with in a dream, only for her to end up being a distant cousin??
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it’s insane how badly this app works now. elon is so fucking bad at this shit
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there is literally no reason why you should be penalized for taunting a guy you just owned on 4th down
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took another rapid covid test and instead of coming up positive/negative it printed out my SSN and JUNE FIFTEENTH TWENTY TWENTY SEVEN THE COVENANT WILL BE SEALED has anyone else gotten this?
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@coopercooperco
this reminds me of the interviews with the writers after some later seasons episodes of game of thrones. “dany forgot about the iron fleet” etc
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@EllieBgarden
@ME_1948_Updates
@HowardA_AtLaw
you're going to bat for a weapons manufacturer *right now*
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this is everyone on here the last two days
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i’m a red dead redemption 2 npc and i love taking my gun out and shooting at anyone who rides a horse within eight feet of me
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sorry not a fun post but today is my 29th birthday and i have decided to get sober. excited to become less funny and interesting at this time
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“the horniest wolf provides humor, but always shoots himself in the head” - ancient proverb
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let’s relitigate the falklands war england is embarrassing give those islands to argentina
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does the LoTR trilogy (extended editions) pass the bechdel test? the answer may surprise you
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you’re watching sporps? that’s funny. i’m expanding my mind reading about world events and topics
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the only affirmatively cool thing about don draper is that he doesn’t vote
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@coopercooperco
@Steady_Squirrel
@notnotnuanced
i did this on a spirit airlines flight and almost crashed the plane
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feel like nobody is calling dollar bills “simoleans” these days
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@coopercooperco
"imagine being in high school when strawberry jam and wolf parade EP came out" yeah it fucking sucked if you listened to that stuff you were a loser
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getting almost zero pussy wearing my taylor swift long sleeve tee?????
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getting a lobotomy and becoming an "enthusiastically participates in company wide zoom chat" guy
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a partnership between a colossally fraudulent organization and also black rifle coffee company
🔊
#CowboysNation
, please welcome America’s Coffee to America’s Team.
We are celebrating America’s birthday all week long by giving away ✌️ tickets to a
#DallasCowboys
home game & a ☝️-year subscription to
@blckriflecoffee
! Click here to learn more.☕️🏈⭐️
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@coopercooperco
that ice aesthetic has stuck with me for like 25 years wrt how cool it was. snowmobiles and translucent orange chainsaws and shit
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