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Better Woj

@BetterWoj

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NBA Senior Insider covering the NBA *parody, formerly @bubblewoj *

Joined July 2020
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@BetterWoj
Better Woj
4 years
After tonight’s loss, Miami Heat guard Duncan Robinson has locker room meltdown, yelled, “Frick!” and slapped his thigh, sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
Kawhi Leonard says he wasn’t talking about a point guard when he told Clippers he wants a new PG, sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
LeBron confirms Bronny James’ whoopin’ will air Wednesday at 8pm on ESPN2. LeBron still undecided on which belt to use, and may opt for extension cord, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
OFFICIAL: The Los Angeles Lakers are hiring J.R. Smith to the training staff as team blunt roller, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Report: Lakers willing to trade Danny Green and Kyle Kuzma for a PS5, hopefully with some games included too, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
The hoop after a Ben Simmons and Danny Green shooting drill, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Kendall Jenner says if the Suns lose Game 3, she will leave Devin Booker for Alex Caruso, sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
Los Angeles Lakers forward Kostas Antetokounmpo walked in on brother Giannis trying on his Lakers uniform, sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
Miami Heat forward Jimmy Butler, seen at breakfast bar this morning, eating bowl of broken glass, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Heat guard Duncan Robinson devastated, kicking and screaming on locker room floor, after teammate Jimmy Butler reveals Santa Claus isn’t real, sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
Similar to Russell Westbrook, Los Angeles Clippers star Kawhi Leonard left Bubble housekeepers with a valuable tip, “don’t trade all your draft picks for Paul George,” sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
Sierra Canyon sophomore guard Bronny James has started running, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Russell Westbrook honors his jersey numbers by starting the season off 0-4, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Lakers forward Jared Dudley calls LeBron and Pelinka this morning and says, “Look, if you need to trade me for a 3rd superstar, straight up, then so be it,” sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Former Bethlehem standout Jesus Christ says he’s “ready to make an impact” this season for the Timberwolves, sources tell ESPN.
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@BetterWoj
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4 years
Alex Caruso’s request to play game in purple and gold durag denied by NBA, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Los Angeles Lakers forward Jared Dudley seen late in the gym last night practicing different ways he’ll sit on a chair this postseason, sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
The rim in this gym out 4-6 weeks, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Breaking: 4x NBA Champion, 4x MVP, 4x Finals MVP, 2003-2004 Rookie of the Year, 17x All-Star, 3x All-Star MVP, 6x All-Defensive, 16x All-NBA forward LeBron James’ legacy on the line tonight in a non-deciding Game 5 against the Phoenix Suns, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
New Lakers forward Montrezl Harrell calling old Clippers teammates and telling them about all the cool new rooms he's allowed to go into now at Staples Center, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
The Los Angeles Clippers’ plan to avoid blowing a 3-1 lead by just getting swept going well, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
The Houston Rockets and James Harden have requested they receive their $30M in all singles, sources tell ESPN.
@BleacherReport
Bleacher Report
3 years
Every NBA team will get $30M to help with financial issues caused by playing with few or no fans to begin the season, per @sbjlombardo
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4 years
Clippers forward Marcus Morris is escorted off Lakers bus at LAX and arrested for attempting to impersonate a champion, sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
Portland Trailblazers guard Damian Lillard called Russell Westbrook and Paul George to remind them about Daylight Savings Time, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
In response to Lakers forward Kyle Kuzma’s ask for a “sizable deal,” Rob Pelinka and Jeanie Buss let out a “sizable laugh,” sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
Miami Heat forward Jimmy Butler wants the season to start tomorrow, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Lakers currently scrimmaging around a still asleep Nate Robinson on Staples Center floor, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
LeBron James texts Kevin Love: “Congrats on your 2nd and less important ring!” sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
In Game 2, the Los Angeles Lakers will attempt a new strategy: reminding Anthony Davis that he’s tall, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Miami Heat guard Duncan Robinson runs out of the car excitedly as his parents drop him off at the arena for the start of his 3rd NBA season, sources tell ESPN.
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Better Woj
4 years
Lakers forward Jared Dudley announces if season starts in December, he’ll sit out for the first month and probably every month after that too, sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
The Utah Jazz plans to film racist fans to be played on the video board to recreate their usual environment, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Sixers fan runs onto the court in an attempt to hit Ben Simmons' free throws for him, sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
Dodgers credit LeBron James for inspiring them to overcome 3-1 deficit, while Braves credit Clippers for inspiring them to blow a 3-1 lead, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Lakers tell Jared Dudley if they get DeMar DeRozan then he has to give him not only his jersey number but also his car, his house, his wallet, and whatever he’s eating at the moment, sources tell ESPN.
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1 year
Breaking: Los Angeles Lakers guard Austin Reaves seen on IG Live showing off new Nintendo Switch controller, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Miami Heat guard Tyler Herro won't stop freestyling at the kids' table at Thanksgiving, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Despite being eliminated in the first round, Lakers forward Jared Dudley’s minutes remain the same, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Los Angeles Lakers forward LeBron James says he is ready to do whatever it takes to get his 5th title, including reading up to page 2 of a book, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
LeBron James texts Cavs GM Koby Altman, “Cleveland! This is for you!” as the Lakers send them Javale McGee to make room for Marc Gasol, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
@KingJames Did he give you a PS5 to say this?
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3 years
Sources: Game 7 of the 2016 NBA Finals is a Christmas movie.
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3 years
Suns fans agree Chris Paul could be a great fit in their 7-man rotation, sources tell ESPN.
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@BetterWoj
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3 years
Future Los Angeles Lakers guard Jayson Tatum comes up short against the Nets in Game 1, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Nets guard Kyrie Irving furious with LeBron’s comments, says he won’t be giving him a Father’s Day gift in 2021, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Miami Heat guard Duncan Robinson "ecstatic" after his coach Erik Spoelstra says he can stay up late tonight to watch the ball drop, sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
Lakers guard J.R. Smith spotted handing out mini bottles of Hennessy to trick-or-treaters, sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
Lakers forward Jared Dudley spends more time on Staples Center court voting than he did playing this last season, sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
Boston Celtics players rallying together to convince teammate Gordon Hayward not to vote, sources tel ESPN.
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4 years
Die-hard Raptors, Warriors, Cavs, Heat, 76ers, Bucks, Bulls, Celtics, Clippers, Hawks, Hornets, Kings, Knicks, Lakers, Magic, Mavs, Nets, Nuggets, Pacers, Pelicans, Pistons, Rockets, Spurs, Suns, Thunder, T-Wolves, Blazers, Wizards fan Drake turns 34 today, sources tell ESPN.
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@BetterWoj
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3 years
Nate Robinson wakes up in hospital to see Mike Tyson and Roy Jones Jr. fighting on TV, asks doctor, “Did Jake Paul knock me into the year 1993?” sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Lakers forward Kyle Kuzma announces the 5 winners of his PS5 giveaway: Rob Pelinka, Jeanie Buss, LeBron James, Anthony Davis, and Frank Vogel. “It was a coincidence. I swear!” he says, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Serge Ibaka signs with the Los Angeles Clippers after Kawhi Leonard’s convincing call to him where he just breathed heavily into the phone for 4 seconds, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
LeBron James brings LeBelt back out after catching Bronny playing 2K with Russell Westbrook on the Lakers, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Clippers stars Kawhi Leonard and Paul George furious with Montrezl Harrell for joining Lakers, both say he will not be getting his 2019 NBA Free Agency Championship ring, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Lakers forward Kyle Kuzma wrestles a mom for last PS5 at Best Buy this morning. Yells, "Please! Twitter won't stop telling Bron to trade me unless I give these out!" sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
Los Angeles Clippers guard Lou Williams petitions NBA to reduce 10-day quarantine, arguing Magic City strippers have built herd immunity, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
BREAKING: You can do this, blow a 3-1 lead, and still get offered $205M less than a year later, sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
Unable to decide on a scary movie, Clippers duo Kawhi Leonard and Paul George rewatch Game 7 against the Nuggets instead, sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
Milwaukee Bucks forward Giannis Antetokounmpo asking his brother Kostas if he can borrow his Lakers uniform for his “Halloween costume,” sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Me in the movie theater parking garage before going into Space Jam 2, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Los Angeles Clippers considering signing Courtside Karen to a 10-day contract, sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
Lakers and Dodgers fans continue the celebration by turning new Clippers arena into Spirit Halloween store overnight, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Klutch Sports CEO Rich Paul still trying to figure out who Nerlens Noel is and how he got Paul’s number, sources tell ESPN.
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Better Woj
3 years
The NBA is opening up an investigation to finally find out which one of these guys is Bojan Bogdanović and which one is Bogdan Bogdanović, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Lakers star LeBron James says Kyle Kuzma will take a giant leap this season... on the Detroit Pistons, sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
Devin Booker asked to leave Kim Kardashian’s private island after asking, “did Drake really smash?” during family game of Truth or Dare, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
After agreeing to five-year, $163M extension with Sacramento Kings, De'Aaron Fox texted Lonzo Ball and called him a “broke boi,” sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
Scouts impressed Bronny didn't cough upon exhale, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Atlanta Hawks guard Kevin Huerter reciting "I Have a Dream" speech at halftime not enough to inspire a Game 6 win, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Number 8 pick Obi Toppin crying on national television after realizing he has to play for the Knicks, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
In response to this, Kawhi Leonard told media, “Cool, he should do it tomorrow,” sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Lakers send championship ring to Danny Green will note, “You will be missed... like most of your shots in the Finals,” sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
FaZe Clan member Bronny James out 6-8 weeks with a broken ass, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
The Philadephia 76ers have decided Ben Simmons will not join the team until he is fully better at basketball, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Yikes, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Former Knicks guard Nate Robinson after he wakes up from his coma, sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
The fly on Mike Pence’s head has just died from Covid, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
BREAKING: Russell Westbrook is being traded for John Wall thus making neither team better, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
In response to Nate Robinson being KO’d by Jake Paul, NBA has decided to retroactively strip him of his 3 Dunk Content championships, sources tell ESPN.
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Better Woj
3 years
Phoenix Suns hire two new assistant coaches to develop game plan that will suck the life out of the Lakers, sources tell ESPN.
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Better Woj
4 years
LeBron to Anthony Davis after Lakers won 2020 title: “This is your team. This is your time.... I’m good. If I retired today, I’m fine... sike! Now go polish my Finals MVP, Scottie!” sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
Los Angeles Lakers guard Alex Caruso asks barbers in the bubble, "How much for a quick shine up top?" sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
The Phoenix Suns off to a hot start after pre-game locker room speech from this fan, sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
Rondo's son still hungover, expected to miss next 4-6 hours of Zoom kindergarten, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Brooklyn Nets willing to pay James Harden’s entire salary in all singles, sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
NBA commissioner Adam Silver traveled to Magic City Sunday to interview several employees about Los Angeles Clippers guard Lou Williams visit. Silver spent over 13 hours in champagne room to conduct “thorough interviews,” sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
President Joe Biden signs legislation to officially recognize this date as “Jalen Rose Can’t Play Defense Day,” sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
The New Orleans Pelicans and Zion Williamson nearing agreement where he will eat at least 1 vegetable during Thanksgiving dinner tomorrow, sourced tell ESPN.
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3 years
Lakers guard Wesley Matthews called Danny Green for advice last night, but like a clutch shot, Danny missed it, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Nuggets center Bol Bol grabs cranberry sauce from complete opposite end of the table without getting up, sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
Former Lakers guard Luol Deng has requested two championship rings, arguing he makes twice as much as Jared Dudley and plays the same amount, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
“nIcE sHoT, tALeN,” Lakers forward Kyle Kuzma mumbles to himself, sources tell ESPN.
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2 years
Miami Heat guard Duncan Robinson celebrated Game 1 performance against the Hawks by using more mayonnaise than usual on his club sandwich, sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
Lakers governor Jeanie Buss and GM Rob Pelinka say decision to vacation in Greece at all the same places as Giannis Antetokounmpo is purely coincidental, sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
Jared Dudley looks like when a fan wears their favorite team's entire uniform, sources tell ESPN.
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4 years
8-year-old fan now leading candidate for Houston Rockets GM position after suggesting, "What if we signed a center?" during interview, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Houston Rockets James Harden says he will continue to eat Philly Cheesesteaks non-stop until he’s traded there, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
BREAKING: The Atlanta Hawks are interested in signing Gordon Hayward just so they can see him in the MLK uniform, sources tell ESPN.
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3 years
Running out of ideas on how to punish humanity, God makes the New York Knicks good, sources tell ESPN.
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