Allison Raskin
@AllisonRaskin
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Writer, podcaster and mental heath advocate. Subscribe to my Substack: Emotional Support Lady! (she/her) #blacklivesmatter
Joined March 2009
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My HOT TAKE of the day is that we need to talk more openly about signs that your therapist sucks so people can find a better clinician sooner and/or not give up on therapy as a whole.
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What if we got rid of Facebook (destructive) and instead just created one big excel sheet with everyone's birthdays (helpful)?
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Single at 23: “I have to go out and meet someone!”
Single at 29: “If it’s meant to be the right person will find me in my home.”
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Normalize not even knowing if your ex is happy or healthy because they are dead to you 🙏🏻
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I got a nose job the summer before senior year of college. When I came back to school people were like "Oh my god! You got bangs!"
I had already had bangs.
The morale of this story is that no one is paying attention to you so just do whatever you want!
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I want Hillary Clinton to divorce Bill and then start dating Pete Davidson.
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One year ago today my fiance walked out on me with almost no explanation. Haven't seen him since.
But I have kept living my life. And that feels like something worth celebrating.
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I used to want a super flat stomach but then I realized it would have zero impact on my day to day life, so now I just want more money.
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What is the best way to tell Twitter that your fiance abruptly left you because "something was missing" and even though you are blindsided and traumatized you will ultimately be okay because you are strong and resilient and will get through this somehow? (asking for me)
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I don’t feel unsafe because I am Jewish.
I feel unsafe because my country won’t let us protest against genocide.
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Me to myself whenever I have the most basic human interaction: “Good good. That seemed normal.”
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Major news stations need to stop focusing on the looting. They are refusing to acknowledge what got us here. They are crafting a distorted and harmful narrative.
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Me: I know he’s gonna propose soon so I probably won’t be that surprised.
Also Me:
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Do I have an unhealthy dependence on my dog? Absolutely. But in my defense he is pretty freaking dependent on me too.
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Random Person Online: You should be a therapist.
Me: Ok!
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An easy way to make a peaceful protest illegal? Randomly announce a 6pm curfew at 5:20 and shut down public transportation.
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I chopped off all my hair and I didn’t even have a mental breakdown!
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It’s wild to me that couples can have different political parties. The biggest fights I’ve ever gotten in with my partner are because he is SLIGHTLY less progressive than me.
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Yesterday my professor said that clients rarely remember what a therapist says but they do remember their therapist’s warmth and presence. I think this can be applied to all relationships. Don’t worry about always saying the right thing. Just be a warm, present body who listens.
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So strange that Trump's foolproof travel ban didn't prevent massive tragedy.
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My fiancé jokingly threatened to call off our wedding the other day, but my ex already did that for real two years ago so I replied “why don’t you trying to have an original thought for once.”
Crushed it 😎
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Live the life you deserve. Throw out your fucking nightmare of a duvet cover and buy a washable quilt. Peace is within reach.
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The old Allison can't come to the phone right now? Why? Oh, cuz she's dead.
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My fiancé wants us to get married in secret months before our wedding so I can get on his health insurance but that would require me to be able to keep a secret.
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Maybe if society wasn't so fat phobic, moderate weight gain wouldn't be viewed as such a horrible medicinal side effect and more people would get the treatment they need.
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I spent pretty much my entire vacation in Mexico depressed but no one could tell because of my delightful instagram stories. Yesterday I finally came out of it.
In conclusion, social media is a lie, mental illness is easy to disguise and I’m very happy to be back!
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Don’t be afraid to ask for the exact type of support you need! After my fiancé abruptly left me, I (mostly) jokingly asked my best friend to remind me once a day for a month that I will find a life partner. It’s now the highlight of my day. It makes me feel hopeful and loved!
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Movie pitch: NONREFUNDABLE— after being abruptly left by her fiancé, a woman scrambles to find a new husband in time for her original wedding date so as not to lose out on the deposits. (Based on a true story)
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Walking around with my hand in front of my face for the rest of my life is going to be difficult but worth it 💍
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Your mental illness is not your personality. It's something that effects your personality and muddles it. But it's not who you are.
For example, without my OCD and anxiety, I am extremely cool and chill. Shocking, I know!
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It's very strange to get abruptly dumped by the person I was engaged to and NOT hate myself as a result. I guess growth is real. Who knew!
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PEOPLE I DON'T FUCK WITH:
1) Trump Supporters
2) People who refuse to open their hearts to Mamma Mia 2
I can only assume there is a lot of overlap.
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If you knew me before I turned 30 I would just like to announce there has been a significant software update and a lot of the bugs have been fixed.
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I'm directing a short film tomorrow. Going to do my best not to sexually harass anyone.
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Got my Google Arts & Culture results. Scary accurate.
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A lot of people think I'm shy but I'm actually just rude.
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I bragged to my boyfriend that I was once featured in Glamour. He asked to see the article and it was titled: “This is What Mental Illness Looks Like.” 😎
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I’m not going to call myself a hero but I did announce my engagement without access to a professional manicure:
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I was "supposed to" get married yesterday but instead I ate ice cream and walked by the beach. Love a great pivot!
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Happy to report that first time in my life a boy I liked wasn’t interested in me and instead of feeling unworthy I thought “what a moron.”
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My boyfriend when we met: “I have never seen The Bachelor and I have no interest in Bachelor Nation.”
My boyfriend now:
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Yesterday a woman walking her muzzled dog exclaimed: “He’s very friendly but he eats cigarettes.”
Takeaway: Never judge a dog by its muzzle. And don’t eat cigarettes.
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Me @ 22: "How can I dress so more men approach me?"
Me @ 28: "How can I dress so more women compliment me and become my friend?"
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I just found out birth control is a "preventative medicine" which confirms my belief that children are a disease.
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One time I told my parents I’d made a new friend named Emily and I wanted a playdate with her. My parents were like “Emily Harris?” And I said “sure.” So we picked up Emily Harris, had a great afternoon and the second we dropped her off I announced “That was the wrong Emily.”
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Me: "I think I'm finally happy."
Me, two hours later: "Let's blow this whole thing up."
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I was the only girl on my college improv team for three years until they kicked me off for “not being funny.” I’m now an adjunct professor at the same university teaching an internet comedy class. My point: don’t give up on your dreams. And maybe don’t listen to men.
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I can personally attest to this because I once had a mental breakdown in France.
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Having a random woman wax my vagina is less uncomfortable than trying to get a cup of coffee from a male barista.
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Two years ago,
@gabydunn
and I were about to have our own TV show. Then our third lead was accused of rape. I finally wrote about this experience and the ripple effect sexual predators have on all the women around them.
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All I want is a fun summer. Adventure. Swimming. A committed monogamous relationship. And extreme financial security.
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BREAKING NEWS: Today a stranger, male, touched my arm and told me to smile. Despite all odds, he remains alive.
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Do you think Ted Cruz just couldn't take it anymore and needed to know what sex looked like?
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It’s hard to properly process heartbreak when you already like your hair and don’t want to dramatically change it in any way.
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Me as an kid: "I don't celebrate Christmas. I'm Jewish!"
Me now: "I will try anything to experience happiness."
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My mom just texted "can we talk?" And I honestly thought she was going to break up with me.
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Here is a thread of unnecessary and appalling police initiated violence to send to all your family members who only watch the news and don’t believe you.
1️⃣3️⃣8️⃣ Seattle, WA: police shoot a teargas canister at a reporter – live on-air as she's reporting
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Things you should never do:
1) Comment on someone's weight
2) Tell me why you are commenting on my weight
3) Talk to me or my son ever again
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I've been posting about my journey dealing with this on my mental health insta. Apparently a lot of people get left like this and some people have found it helpful. It's already an amazing community that has given me so much strength. You can follow @/emotionalsupportlady
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It took 28 Valentine’s Days but I finally feel understood.
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Now that I have a tattoo...actually that's it. I just wanted everyone to know I have a tattoo.
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When I asked my 3 year old niece to be my flower girl yesterday she said she couldn’t do it because she didn’t have any flowers. But then she suggested going outside to get some so we are back on!
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This is the call I’ve been waiting for. This is going to change everything.
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When my fiance abruptly left me, I asked my friend, "How long am I going to be miserable?! Three months?!"
It was three months.
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I think I might not be the right person to plan a wedding because all these people keep asking for my "vision" and I'm like "I definitely want it to look like...a wedding."
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Certain men will never change their behavior until their jobs are at risk. I propose the following plan:
1) Take away their jobs
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People: "We found an alien."
Government: "No, that's from the ocean."
People: "Oh, okay."
Government to self: "That was close."
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Is “No Dating December” a thing or did I just start it?
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My six year old niece handed this to my sister during her class this morning and I am DEAD. She is the voice of her generation:
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There should be a universal code word that lets people know without a doubt "this behavior is making me uncomfortable."
What about "stop?"
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It’s sort of funny we’ve all just agreed to get up every day and pretend things matter.
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While in line at a bagel place an older woman kept staring at me and I assumed I had done something to piss her off. Then she told me I look like Snow White.
ALWAY ASSUME THE BEST AND THAT YOU LOOK LIKE A DISNEY PRINCESS!
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OCD as a debilitating illness is so misunderstood that my professor in a CLINICAL PSYCHOLOGY program casually said, “A little OCD is helpful in grad school! You have to be a little OCD to get through this stuff.”
YIKES!
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Should I do a nude photo shoot when I hit my weight loss goal? Or should I just eat a donut?
Or is the right answer, both at the same time???
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Yesterday, my new boyfriend kept calling me well-adjusted! If that’s not a ringing endorsement for therapy, medication and putting in the work, I don’t know what is!
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I need to stop getting high on dates because I always think I’m falling in love when I actually just love weed
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You: "Would you rather live forever or-"
Me: "The other thing. I pick the other thing."
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I wrote this article for NBC. I wanted to title it “Who is Logan Paul and Why We Shouldn’t Care.”
Logan Paul's apology isn't enough. Don't let YouTube be defined by white men like him.
vai
@AllisonRaskin
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I knew returning home to LA three months after my fiancé abruptly left me would be difficult and dramatic. But even I found collapsing on the airport bathroom floor because my knee dislocated A BIT MUCH.
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“You need food more than you need love. Remember that.” - My mom successfully helping me navigate heartbreak
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Not a huge fan of America right now but fuck me if I don’t love a daytime party.
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Guys on dating apps keep telling me I'm funny like I don't already know.
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Here is a photo of my boyfriend shotgunning a La Croix proving you can still have fun in your thirties.
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Child: "Why is today different from all the other days?"
Me: "It's the one day it's hip for Republicans to pretend to respect women."
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Young people not voting blows my mind. We are the ones who are going to be left with this shit! Also, it’s a great Instagram photo.
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MY FRIENDS WHEN I TELL THEM I WANT TO BECOME MEME FAMOUS:
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I met my boyfriend on a dating app but I’m not gonna say which one unless they pay me.
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Tried to think of a clever subtweet about Youtube restricting LGBTQ content but all I could come up with is "what the fuck."
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Just when I think my grandma can’t out grandma herself:
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