Today I called my boss a bald headed broke bitch in sign language and he told me it was really cool that I was learning another language.

ICE going door to door is why Anne Frank was in an attic.

Oh hey guys 👋🏻 tell me something good that's happening in your life.

Manifesting political accountability. Loudly.

@SHRTampa

New year who dis?

Today I found out that the Hard Rock Casino is dog friendly and I thought more people should know that. I hope this helps! 🤗

A White Elephant exchange but it's all wigs and you have to wear what you get.

Felt cute might summon demons later idk

#nomakeup #nofilter

If our song can't be "Africa" by Toto, it's not going to work.

I've spent way too much time today planning my dog's birthday party. - No one ever

Let me sleep in your t-shirt and hold your hand you dumb piece of shit.

Interview With a Vampire but it's Oprah interviewing.

HR friendly Madonna - Happy Halloween! 🎃

A haunted house but it's just screenshots of your MySpace page.

I tried to take a nice picture with my dog.

Giving mean girl energy in your 30s is embarrassing.

"Two all beef patties....special sauce...lettuce...cheese...pickles....onions...on a sesame seed buuuuun" 😱

Due to creative differences, Diet Coke and I have decided to go our separate ways. I have already begun pursuing other beverages. Please respect our privacy at this time. 🙏🏻