i’ve got all the pieces for a funny tweet in my head right now but none of the finesse

not enough hours in the day for all the songs I want to hyper fixate on 😔

the guy training me keeps complimenting how quickly i type and it is absolutely going to my head

crashed boys night and they’re all talking about grey’s anatomy

love how we all decided bangs are embarrassing and fringe is cool

whenever my bf wants me to stop singing so loud he plays mexican music (like that’ll stop me)

for valentines i promoted my bf to my emergency contact, romance

played zombie by the cranberries in front of my bf's mom last week and she asked if it was shakira i simply cannot unhear it

it’s always the smartest people who fill the dishwasher in the dumbest ways (@ my roomies w love)

when u run out of ur anti depressants and ur health insurance in the same month

my little activist babies have been covering the school in signs demanding an art program 🥹😭

a kindergartener is running around the school chanting, “im never going to class!! im not here to learn!! im going on strike!!” and honestly i respect it

wonder how mona lisa would feel knowing 5th grade boys in 2023 are obsessed w her

trying to find fast food that isn’t actively supporting genocide

“my dad drinks beer! he drinks 10 beers!!” “my mom drinks tequila!! tequila is stronger but it can’t kill you, it just makes you really sleepy” - second grade boys

the biggest mystery in my life is that my bf and i wear the same sized jeans

retiring “best friend” for “nearest and dearest”

“I have been BEGGING them to let me carve my name into that dance floor.”

10:30 am and already had a table flipped in my classroom…reeeeeaaaal monday energy

just the sleepiest girl trying to keep it together as four separate kindergarteners are sobbing in my room

who needs therapy when you can just watch this scene on repeat 😭