Bloody Aardvark
@AardvarkBloody
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Pinned Tweet
Which shortage will come first?
South Africans must brace themselves for egg and chicken shortages in the coming months, with SA's largest producer Astral Foods warning on Thursday the country is wrestling with its worst-ever outbreak of bird flu. |
@News24_Business
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@MbalulaFikile
Then why don't you resign in order for a well-informed person to be appointed?
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BREAKING: President Cyril Ramaphosa marks 2200 days in office without making a decision.
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BREAKING: President Cyril Ramaphosa accidentally swaps South Africa's most wanted list with ANC's election candidate list.
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Eventually, the US will conclude that South Africa is simply to stupid too remain part of AGOA - and kick us out.
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Ramaphosa's speech in praise of decolonised education was written by AI.
Credit to
@RomanCabanac
for the hunch and
@mike_said_what
for the proof. 1/2
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BREAKING: Carl Niehaus apoplectic with rage after local bookshop admits it doesn't stock Julius Malema memoir "Mein Gazebo".
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On 11 August 2021 Babita Deokaran sent a WhatsApp to her boss, Gauteng DOH CFO Lerato Madyo: “Morning CFO, I am just worried that the guys in Tembisa are going to realise we are not releasing their payments and know that we are on to something. Our lives could be in danger.”
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The Post Office owes:
1. Medical schemes R720 million
2. Compensation Fund R115 million
3. Pension funds R1.2 billion
4. SARS R700 million
5. UIF
This is almost R3 billion deducted from the salaries of THEIR OWN employees and not paid over.
Somehow the SA Post Office owes Sars R700m … How has it been able to get away with this?
#PostOffice
#Debt
#BusinessRescue
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BREAKING: President Cyril Ramaphosa promises South Africa five more years of pure, unadulterated bullshit, horseshit and dogshit "whether they like it or not".
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BREAKING: ANC Integrity Commission clears former Steinhoff CEO Markus Jooste of all allegations of impropriety after "generous" R100 million donation.
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Guess who headed those labour unions when they destroyed the local clothing industry.
@SABCNews
Thr clothing industry in South Africa which used to employ half a million people in South Africa during its heydays has been totally destroyed by the unions with exorbitant wage demands. A lot of factories are now based in Rwanda employing hundreds of people. Unions are a curse…
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This was very clever from
@alanwinde
He knows Putin can't be arrested by WC law enforcement.
But he forced the ANC to declare its position: The ANC will support a war criminal and defy the laws of the country.
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The press should not attend these briefings by the "electricity minister".
Ramokgopa has no expertise, no insight, no authority, no knowledge, no solutions, and no clue.
He is there to shield Gordhan, Mantashe and Ramaphosa from providing answers.
WATCH] Electricity Minister Dr Kgosientsho Ramokgopa says efforts are being made to avoid stage six
#Loadshedding
and balance the grid. "Since November last year, we have made sure that we don't get to stage six."
#Newzroom405
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BREAKING: ANC to auction off original Freedom Charter to raise funds to pay R100 million election poster debt.
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BREAKING: SARS goes after Gwede Mantashe over R280k sugar tax assessment.
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Erasing the legacy of apartheid one library at a time. Brakpan.
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Meet Dr Kgosientso Ramokgopa, the minister of electricity. He gets paid R2 million p/a to put on a suit, get on a plane and travel with a blue light cavalcade and VIP security to tell SA: "The power switch is off."
Let me tell you what I think about this.
It's FUCKED!
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My vote goes to any party that vows to fire this man.
[WATCH] Electricity Minister Kgosientsho Ramokgopa delivers his message to
#Tintswalo
. "I want to say as your honest uncle, uncle Sputla, I know of your anger, I feel your pain, and I understand your cries, that load shedding is contracting and closing your capabilities".
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In 2016 at least 144 mental patients were starved or neglected to death under the Gauteng provincial government of media darlings Makhura, Lesufi and Creecy.
To date not a single ANC cadre has been held to account.
A British nurse will be sentenced on Monday for murdering seven newborn babies and attempting to kill six others while they were in her care.
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BREAKING: Recovering prosecutor Shamila Batohi celebrates five years clean of prosecutions.
"I know I'll always be a prosecutor," she said, "but if I just take it one case at a time, attend the weekly meetings of the deployment commitee and lose myself in junkfood I'll be OK."
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ANC, why did you fight tooth and nail for three years to hide records you do not have?
THE ANC CALLS OUT DA’S POLITICAL GASLIGHTING ON CADRE DEPLOYMENT.
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The Guptas must be kicking themselves for fleeing the country. They had nothing to worry about.
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Former Public Protector and Law Trust Chair in Social Justice Prof Thuli Madonsela adds her own little spice to a blatant untruth.
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BREAKING: Panyaza Lesufi says his provincial government will import a five kilometre stretch of Kwazulu-Natal coastline to give Gauteng's residents "something to smile about".
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Thapelo Amad is a Johannesburg city councillor and is a member of the ruling coalition headed by the ANC.
What does
@GunFreeSA
have to say about politicians brandishing automatic weapons?
@Paratus2014
@k9_reaper
@Lesufi
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BREAKING: President Cyril Ramaphosa admits that competing with organised crime has been his government's greatest challenge.
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Is this option available for every taxpayer or does it only come with the Cadre Premium Plus Plan?
Hawks head Godfrey Lebeya can breathe a sigh of relief after the SA Revenue Service (Sars) withdrew its threat to attach his assets after he failed to settle his R3 million tax debt. |
@City_Press
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What is the point of this minister?
LIVE: Ramokgopa briefs media on performance of the electricity grid
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South Africa has "graduated" out of AGOA, says Ebrahim Patel.
Translated: South Africa received an American degree in GFY.
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BREAKING: Study shows Carl Niehaus developing at an alarming rate and may be able to replicate human thought in five years.
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Money for blue light brigades, endless buffets, VIP security, skinny jeans, cadres on paid suspension, every health court case, 33% BEE markup on procurement, vanity projects, and even assassins.
But no money for doctors.
ANC minister Joe Phaahla: Budget constraints (imposed by ANC government) to blame for unemployed medical graduates. (He speaks as if he is not part of the government that caused the problem in the first place.)
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The unnamed middlemen are the BEE cronies who must, according to Pravin Gordhan and Ebrahim Patel, form part of all procurement.
Loadshedding is deliberate, a policy meant to financially benefit the ANC.
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Blue light cavalcades, helicopter rides, diplomatic flights... it's all about moving large piles of cash to and from the laundromats.
We are dealing with an organised crime syndicate using government as an alias.
Nosiviwe Mapisa-Nqakula is being investigated in connection with claims that she was paid millions of rand in bribes. Get the full details in the
#SundayTimesZA
tomorrow.
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@IvoVegter
I disagree. Her personal information, house keys, etc. were all taken. In a case of sudden emergency with possible life-threatening implications, the victim is allowed to take reasonable steps - like she did.
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BREAKING: Fikile Mbalula escorted under armed guard to secret Siberian laboratory "for further study".
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These documents are returns of service from the sheriff that show the bank accounts of the ANC at Nedbank and FNB have been attached.
This follows the party's loss in the Supreme Court of Appeal for payment of a R102 million debt.
(The ANC still has a Concourt appeal left.)
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The reason why socialism has always failed, is because "it hasn't been done right".
The reason why cadre deployment failed is because "it hasn't been done right", says Thuli Madonsela.
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FROM THE ARCHIVES: National Coronavirus Command Council holds emergency meeting to determine if Crocs are "open-toed".
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BREAKING: Carl Niehaus hijacks bus with frail care patients to fill quota for EFF rally.
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BREAKING: South Africa to change its main bank account from the World Bank to the Postbank to prevent monthly R50 billion debit order from going off.
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"(Her) bail affidavit refers to the terrible state of SA's prisons, which she contends are unsafe, lack proper medical care and are crime-ridden and incapable of any form of rehabilitation, because wardens are overwhelmed 'trying to stop inmates from killing each other'".
LIVE | State says Mapisa-Nqakula faces 12 counts of corruption, one of money-laundering
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BREAKING: President Cyril Ramaphosa says hellish pit toilet at Mpumalanga school must be given more time to renew itself.
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Mampara of the Millennium
Health Minister, Joe Phaahla, has assured critics of the National Health Insurance Fund (NHIF), that it will not be ruined by corruption.
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How many times did you ask this during NEC meetings?
Why do people who are not at all poor take money that they are not entitled to?
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BREAKING: Indignant Jacob Zuma demands whether "anti-transformation forces" expect him to be terminally ill forever.
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Cadre records:
1. One of the richest businessmen in the country held meetings where no minutes were taken.
2. A random cadre's laptop crashed and lots of records were lost. Too bad.
3. He also deleted lots and lots of emails.
4. Cde Duarte was in charge but she's dead. RIP.
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BREAKING: Deputy DG of Health Dr Nicholas Crisp says NHI will work as long as every South African donates "at least one" kidney.
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Firstly, the fighter you see on the picture stealing the phone, that's not him. Secondly, that phone didn't even have airtime. Finally, it's not even a real phone. It's a fake phone. A toy. Anyone who thinks otherwise is racist. Irredeemably. - Issued by Economic Freedom Fuckers
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BREAKING: ANC says NEC member Mduduzi Manana "almost completely rehabilitated", now only bliksems women with his weaker hand.
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Koeberg should be decommissioned.
This government simply cannot be in charge of a nuclear power plant.
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Sensible people warn SA is burning its bridges with the West, which will lead to catastrophe.
The ruling ANC knows better.
Sensible people's warnings about electricity, poverty, crime, education, health, unemployment were similarly brushed off.
Here we are, in Shit Street.
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The court order is one page. It says: hand over the requested documents. How long do you need to study it?
The ANC has noted the judgement of the Constitutional Court on cadre deployment which is a practice not exclusive to the ANC both in South Africa and abroad.
The ANC will study the judgement to ensure that it is adhered to accordingly.
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BREAKING: Energy minister Gwede Mantashe paid sangoma R200k to curse Pravin Gordhan with "terrible" constipation.
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What culture will you leave behind
@DesBailes
except for half a carton of sour milk and a mouldy odour?
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BREAKING: Justice minister Ronald Lamola says his department is "resting" from trying extradite the Guptas.
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BREAKING: Public Enterprises Minister Pravin Gordhan rejects Transnet board's preferred CEO candidate as "too white".
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BREAKING: President Cyril Ramaphosa says the biggest regret of his first term of office is that he may get a second term.
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Honourable member of parliament: ANC MP Ponani Makhubele-Marilele.
This is a South African minister of parliament.
I don’t even know where to begin.
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"Board chairperson Derek Hanekom said while there is a 'legacy of bad stories', the last four years are water under the bridge."
R24 billion
"It's not the end of the world."
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Dear
@helenzille
@jsteenhuisen
You are not the future of SA.
Thousands of your votes are "defensive votes" from people who hate the ANC more.
Now you're even alienating us.
If you truly wish to rescue SA, and not just yourselves, join forces with others and offer potential.
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What is the difference between dropping a bomb on a child and stealing the money that would have prevented the starvation of a child?
Nearly five million of the country's 20 million children are starving
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The most disgraceful part of the ANC's conduct is not that they refuse to pay their R100 million debt.
It's that they refuse to pay a single cent of it. They received all the election material, campaigned on it and won the election.
Look what's happened to Ezulweni so far:
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I pay (some indirectly): income tax, company tax, fuel levy, dividend tax, CGT, VAT, plastic tax, carbon tax, excise, sin tax, transfer duty, import tax. Then I pay VAT on services government doesn't provide: health, security, education, electricity, etc.
WTF more do you want?
OPINIONISTA: An open letter to the South African middle class — introspect and then act to make positive change
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Yesterday Mapisa-Nqakula resigned as Speaker and MP, yet gets to keep her taxpayer-funded convoy. How does that work?
Former National Assembly Speaker Nosiviwe Mapisa-Nqakula’s convoy arrives at the Lyttelton Police station where she will hand herself over to law enforcement. For more visit
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Deployed cadre from the ANC's Human Rights Commission begs Durban residents who receive R60000 water bills despite no water for 150 days not to blame the ANC.
This is not satire.
Don’t politicise water crisis, Human Rights Commission urges
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Next year I'm voting for more corruption, murder, unemployment, rape and starvation - because "it's better than the rest".
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Never forget that the same government that has gone to the International Court of Justice "to protect Palestinians" went to a South African court NOT to protect South Africans.
How bad are the cops at doing their job when taxi bosses are involved? On 12 Feb, we reported the High Court skewered police over their failure to investigate attacks on Intercape buses. SAPS is now punting an appeal. Watch our video to understand why:
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BREAKING: NPA drops all state capture investigations because of Guptas' "lack of enthusiasm" for arrest and prosecution.
"Nothing's more depressing than when corrupt scumbags give you the middle finger," said a spokesman. "To be fair, we'd have probably bungled the case anyway."
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"South Africa has proved that it is a cheap date. Give it a little attention, and it stands for nothing and falls for everything."
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Cut the catering budget by 3.5% to find the required R15 billion.
The Finance Minister Enoch Godongwana has to find around R15-billion to plug a revenue gap. Where should he get it from? Should he raise VAT? A wealth tax? Or should he cut back on spending?
#SAfmSunrise
@SAfmRadio
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List of Rome Statute member states that have cunningly assisted an accused on an ICC arrest warrant escape that have also laid charges with the ICC:
1. Republic of South Africa
2. ...
SOUTH AFRICA APPROACHES THE INTERNATIONAL COURT OF JUSTICE UNDER THE GENOCIDE CONVENTION WITH RESPECT TO ACTS COMMITTED BY ISRAEL IN THE CONTEXT OF ITS ATTACKS ON GAZA
South Africa is gravely concerned with the plight of civilians caught in the present Israeli attacks on the…
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So when will the SARS AI become aware that top ANC politicians have to pay tax as well?
How SARS used AI and proactive measures to claw back R210bn this tax year
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To save resources SAPS can instruct Mapisa-Nqakula's own VIP cops to arrest her.
They're trained to deal with threats to the security of the nation - as we've seen with the Mashatile scuffle.
The Speaker’s application to interdict her arrest has been struck from the roll (with costs) for lack of urgency.
That means she either has to hand herself over to the police, or the police must now arrest her.
#MapisaNqakula
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@spectatorindex
A 50th dose of the AstraZeneca vaccine will bring you so close to immunity to Covid that you will only have to wear a mask on Wednesdays.
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BREAKING NEWS: Post Office to retrench 2500 ghost workers as part of radical business rescue plan.
Senior ghost workers may qualify for severance packages; Zwelinzima Vavi to lead march to Union Buildings; Cyril Ramaphosa unleashes commission of inquiry led by ghost judge.
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At this very moment comrade acting SAA chair Hanekom sits on every contract signed by Dudu Myeni and almost a decade of hidden SAA financial statements.
But there have been no arrests!
Care to explain, comrade?
Quote: "If there is a proper investigation into corruption at Eskom, a few ministers and premiers will burn."
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BREAKING: President Cyril Ramaphosa admits South Africa's challenges would keep him awake at night if it wasn't for his "enormous hoard of fuck you money".
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BREAKING: DA election prospects get considerable boost after John Steenhuisen contracts laryngitis.
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BREAKING: ANC promises to replace "inhumane" water supply with cadre connected water tankers should it win the Western Cape.
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BREAKING: Public Enterprises Minister Pravin Gordhan says if you think he's a doos you never met his dad.
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BREAKING: Cricket South Africa orders U19 Protea player David Teeger to bowl five wides in a row for "safety" reasons.
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A South African cabinet minister - or even higher up - is fingered as a warlord whose hit squads roam the Mpumalanga province, killing opponents and destroying the country's power utility.
@CyrilRamaphosa
says it's none of his concern.
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SA sells weapons to Russia then goes "to make peace"; our president gets bombed by our BFF in Kyiv; we try to smuggle 13 crates of weapons into Poland; we have the wrong documents and fly to the wrong airport; then blame racism for everything.
South Africa invites ridicule.
I have observed that SA whites are pissed with CR's visit to Zelensky in his quest for peace, such that they applaud Italy, Poland & Hungary for treating SA with so much disdain, and they think they will be respected when they travel to these countries in future, as SAns!
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BREAKING: South African government designates Hamas as acapella group.
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My vote has always been an simple, moral choice.
I'd rather vote for the admittedly unlikeable DA than the criminal ANC and EFF.
The majority of the country, including the media, choose to support criminals.
That is the transformation the ANC achieved.
@RenaldoGouws
Wait so you still don't understand what the actual issue is?
The DA could get unemployment in the Cape to 10% and most South Africans wouldn't vote for them because of Helen & John's daily own goals. Perceptions matter. This is politics.
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Ebrahim Patel has been a minister in the economic cluster of cabinet for 15 years.
15 FUCKING years!
South Africa’s logistics and energy crises have made it difficult for black industrialists to succeed, says Minister of Trade and Industry Ebrahim Patel.
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When the ANC government used hundreds of billions in taxes to prop up SOEs (and enrich themselves) they called it "bailouts".
Now, when they will take your pensions for the same thing, it is called "investment".
ANC wants to force fund managers to invest in state infrastructure projects and work done by SOEs in the
#SundayTimesZA
tomorrow.
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From "heads will roll" to "hey, here's R47 billion".
What a turnaround strategy!
This is a company with no CEO, no CFO and 100 000 containers stuck at two ports.
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BREAKING: President Cyril Ramaphosa announces national day of prayer for Eskom.
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@chrisyelland
@Eskom_SA
8 December: Mantashe accuses De Ruyter of treason
13 December: attempt on De Ruyter's life
14 December: De Ruyter resigns
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Tenderpreneurs are funded by state contracts. You (and your children) pay for it.
The ANC and its head honchos are sponsored largely by tenderpreneurs.
Connect the dots.
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The hit on Babita Deokaran was arranged by ANC cadres and/or cronies.
The ones before court are the hitmen.
Trial of 6 accused of arranging a hit on Babita Deokaran begins
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R3 billion of the budget has already been stolen.
Launch of the R1 Billion Housing Project in the Northern Cape
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BREAKING: President Cyril Ramaphosa consoles demoralised nation that all cadres will receive lifestyle audits in the afterlife.
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No,
@GaytonMcK
, what this means is that you, a skilled, experienced and convicted crook, got completely outplayed by the ANC and the EFF.
You should be ashamed to call yourself a criminal.
We must put the citizens of Joburg first and admit we have backed the wrong horse. Thapelo Amad has been asked to climb a mountain too high for him. It’s not just harming Joburg, it’s destroying him too. We will rectify this blunder. Amad should resign now. We apologise profusely
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Any South African who, at this point in time, is not clinically depressed, is seriously fucked-up.
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Electricity warnings - ignored
Water warnings - ignored
Crime warnings - ignored
Education warnings - ignored
Economy warnings - ignored
Transport warnings - ignored
Health warnings - ignored
Immigration warnings - ignored
"We are determined"
Disease outbreaks such as the cholera outbreak in Hammanskraal are made far worse in situations of poor governance, weak management and poor maintenance of infrastructure. We have responsibility – and are determined – to remedy those shortcomings in a sustainable way and as a…
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