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@valueselectTV
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You need to pick a job where AI cannot replace you.
AI refuses to be racist.
Therefore, you need to become racist. (Or a magician) [or both]
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In the name of Value Select, I hereby declare today Gamer’s Eve.
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“I was a gifted kid” is the academic version of “I could’ve gone pro” 🏈
Imagine blowing a 5th grade lead, and then taking a weird masochistic pride in that 🤔
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Yes.
Missouri Senator Nick Schroer has proposed a rule change in the state's Senate that would permit senators to challenge each other to duels as a means of resolving disputes.
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3K
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My son asked me,
“What happens when we die?”
I had to laugh, then said,
“Woah, who said anything about WE?”
I put him up for adoption later that day.
I am NOT falling for a suicide cult again.
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Heartbreaking actual picture of California air quality right now...
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Found a hat I lost 4 years ago on a windy mountain trail….
Big W today.
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YouTubers be like: face reveal, at one million subscribers.
Dudes on Chat Roulette be like: penis reveal, right now, just for you
Giving the fans what they want.
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I made this song for group project leaders everywhere:
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I gotta ask:
What video got you introduced to VALUE SELECT?
And what video do you use to introduce others?
(Crafting the perfect stream experience, need an ascendant YouTube deck.)
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How To Solve Cancel Culture (Scientifically)
This sucker hit a million big ones on the main channel.
Salutes.
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VALUE SELECT is best viewed PURE, please, use an ADBLOCK on my channel, I IMPLORE YOU!
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"Science can take us to the moon, but it can't stop us from hating ourselves once we're there..."
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Enjoy your romantic teen years, because your twenties are all about paying too much to live in an apartment complex that looks like prison.
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Incredible indirect marketing by a billion dollar franchise.
Or uh, I mean, random viral trend made by kids, for kids 😎 (we’re in control!)
It’s cool how trends are never pushed by major players, we really are creative 😊
Now quick! Everyone dog pile on the same joke!
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The cure for anxiety is: get jacked.
Guy at the party calls you awkward?
You smash his face.
Police try to arrest you?
You bend their guns.
The president calls a state of emergency?
You throw him into orbit, and stage a political coup.
New Law: Everyone be nice to me.
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The Greatest Career Move in the History of Value Select…
THE NATIONAL TOUR!
A GOLDEN HOUR OF MUSICAL MADNESS, with
@thejazzemu
FLYING FROM ENGLAND TO PLAY SUPPORT!
Thanks to
@RealGoodTouring
, and
@egoraptor
for taking a chance on a winning bet!
TICKETS GO LIVE FRIDAY!!!!
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Thought you should see this today ❤️
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I want to see a stoic streamer; silently losing on Apex Legends repeatedly.
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“That’s a nice NFT you have there… Hand it over, or I’ll right-click it myself”
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“He’s just a friend!”
Okay, prove it, have a sleepover with him right now.
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Did the inventor of the folding chair TRULY believe his creation would be ONLY be used for sitting?
Or did he know it would evolve?
That teenagers would soon carry many at once, to impress women at church?
Could he have predicted the WWE?
He is a genius after all.
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Just to let you know my personal goals, I'm going to attempt all Spotify uploads at 100k subs (including promised extended versions)
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There is no torture like the generosity of a winning Monopoly player.
The pity cash they "give" you.
To keep you in the game?
No.
To prolong your suffering.
Forced to haunt the board; unable to advance, unable to die.
A mere symbol of that player's ungodly wealth.
KILL ME!
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My brothers, we just realized…
We did 13 VS shows, in 15 days…
Over 4,000 miles traveled…
Holy hell.
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This Christmas, the Value Select Channel celebrates it’s 5th Anniversary! 🎉🎄⚔️
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VS ALBUM NOW SINCE 100k
Top 5 extended songs to have on it?
(Hit Me With Your Car is a Given)
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Tell me how you found the channel! I’d love to hear it. You reply here, or DM me, either way! ❤️🙏🏻
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Knives < Forks < Spoons
Knives can only cut and stab.
Forks can cut, stab, and twirl.
Spoons, given enough wrist strength, can do it all.
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So TEXAS wants to secede from the union, and that's "cool!" and "brave!"
But when I try to secede a STRANGER from his WALLET, all of the sudden, I'm a CRIMINAL, because that's a CRIME.
Double standards make me sick. (also rollercoasters, gravitrons, anything carnival related)
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