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Derek

@ricketyoldshack

Followers
1,269
Following
188
Media
9,167
Statuses
258,536

This will end well.

Canada
Joined January 2009
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
9 years
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
I am told Americans cherish this and it would be wrong to take it away.
@drewtoothpaste
drewtoothpaste.bsky.social
5 years
The Health Insurance Marketplace just offered me a $981/mo plan that covers literally nothing until you reach a $10,500 yearly deductible. The Marketplace rates this plan three out of five stars.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
5 years
"Guys, I invented a racist doorbell."
@ACLU
ACLU
5 years
Amazon wants to connect doorbell cameras to facial recognition databases, with the ability to call the police if any “suspicious” people are detected.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
"You're gonna need to eat more food." --the tapeworm in your gut
@thefader
The FADER
4 years
Spotify CEO Daniel Ek says working musicians can no longer release music only “once every three to four years.”
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
I'm going to suggest Whole Foods' CEO consume a satchel of dicks.
@jason_koebler
Jason Koebler
4 years
Whole Foods CEO suggests employees who are not sick "donate" their vacation time to employees who are sick:
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
3 years
@freddiesayers @DSORennie @unherd Meanwhile in glorious America, you're just shoving retail, food service and industrial food workers into a woodchipper. But go on.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
@KidMusse You didn't pay your hosting bill.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
2 months
Ngannou could have been knocked out just as bad, if not worse in the UFC, and made far less money for it. It's unfortunate he didn't get to be that 0.1% possibility, but no one can seriously denigrate what he has accomplished with his combat sports career.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
5 years
@Adrian_Hilton @RichardBentall @montie @wabbey How delightfully self-serving. If I stop hitting you, I will consider my main role as stopping the violence.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
@neal_landauer @robrousseau *looks around at the world in which we live* No.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
6 months
@ByYourLogic Op seems to earnestly believe college football players do their homework lmao.
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Cutting Deron Winn, after he passed out and got concussed *IN THE UFC'S PEFORMANCE CENTER* 3 days before Christmas reinforces my belief that it is a moral imperative to give the UFC zero dollars.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
1 month
We are right on schedule.
@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 months
If history is any indication, Jon Jones will need to commit at least 1 criminal offence and have his belt stripped before we see him back in the cage.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
6 years
In a show of bipartisanship, Doug Jones is going to take his dick out at the mall.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
2 years
I doubted Pena before she beat Nunes. I still doubt her now. Even if she wins, I will continue to doubt.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
3 months
@murderxbryan LMAO the wife seems to actually understand music too.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
3 years
@UrsulaLawrence If I were homeless I would simply obtain shelter.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
2 months
A guy whose highlight reel is 50% him getting punched in the face: antibiotics were my downfall against Dustin Poirier.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
2 months
@murderxbryan I would have shouted "have you tried being funnier" until I was removed.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
11 months
A huge contributing factor to my rapidly diminishing interest in MMA is simply how embarrassing this carny sport is at every level.
@BloodyElbow
Bloody Elbow
11 months
"As a collective man group, we need to elect somebody who is gonna put women back in the kitchen," Sean Strickland at his pre-fight press conference
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
8 years
Obama's cutting it awfully close if he intends to steal your guns.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
The experts have weighed in. Thanks, Josh.
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Derek
4 years
@JMosios I also fear a world without bungling, violent US intervention.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
"Suspected alligator."
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
5 years
RIP to a real one.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
6 years
I am so happy Woodley gets to keep trolling the UFC and its racist fans by continuing to be welterweight champ.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 months
@CantEverDie Imagining Miles being picked out of a dumpster like a human-sized claw game.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 months
If teachers really could indoctrinate peope, all the morons on this platform would know what a pronoun actually is. Here's a hint: it's not a person's name.
@FrankieEdgar
Frankie Edgar
4 months
Just saw a shirt here in Toronto that said my pronouns are Sean/Strickland. Hahaha so good!!
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
2 months
Sean Strickland acting like a hard-ass and then hopping into his car to record another sobbing testimonial for social media is completely in character.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
8 months
I find it incredibly in-character for Izzy to have done just barely enough to earn a DUI in the eyes of the judges.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
@NYDailyNews @PennGSE He whipped his dick out in front of co-workers and THIS is what you come up with?
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
3 years
@karinjohnson @WLWT I keep finding weed syringes in apples on halloween. I bet it's the same guy!
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
3 years
Askren isn't representing MMA (in a boxing match?) he's representing washed athletes chasing clout in the most embarrassing fashion.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
@LadyMagaUSA No one went bankrupt in Italy because they got cancer, but do go on.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
@thehill *laughs in Iraqi*
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
@GarbageApe I am willing to admit that perhaps I am projecting, but Bernie's a better man than I am considering how little it seems to faze him. He must be used to disingenuous.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
@Jazzyre99350684 @SikhProf "Pardon me ma'am, could you perchance consider being a tad less racist. My humblest thanks. Regards, the person you are illegally confining."
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@EO10925 @nypost Yeah, Twitter's a great example of this principle. How many feature rollouts have already been walked back because no one knows how this thing works anymore?
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
3 years
@willmenaker I see young Cody has been retconnned out of the Will Menaker cinematic universe. A shame.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
2 years
It's been 48 hours and my brain still hasn't processed the fact I saw a guy win an MMA fight in Dubai and then shoutout the Iranian protest movement before suggesting they give themselves over to Jesus.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
5 months
@DangerBrooks @FightsCameraPod Man, it would really suck if the technology that doesn't exist followed me to my Mars colony which will never exist.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
6 years
I completely forgot there is a guy in the old Paperboy game trying to suck his own dick on the sidewalk.
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This is a guy who started a league where dudes just slap each other in the face and can't defend.
@sportbible
SPORTbible
1 year
Dana White on football 🗣️: “Can’t stand soccer, I think it’s the least talented sport on earth. There’s a reason three year olds can play soccer ok? You run around and kick a ball." "Do you know how untalented you have to be to score three points when the net is this big?”
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
@laurenduca White supremacy is putting a Jewish man on the debate stage?
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 months
Whenever I disparage UFC fans for being CHUDs, I get told to stop watching. Buddy, I still love fights, I just don't like you lol.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
3 months
You can tell me the UFC fanbase hasn't devolved. You would be wrong, but those are words you can use.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
Your boss pays out $1.60 out of every $10 fighters bring in, but go on chief.
@GamebredFighter
Jorge Masvidal
4 years
Lesson for the week and please send videos showing completion #supernecessary
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 months
@emaeriaeem @IntJust @BadEmpanada @YaarDabestaani Are you posting this from a locked garage with a running vehicle in it?
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
3 months
@CantEverDie It stops a build-up of wokeness, they should thank you.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
3 years
@JasonAmadi He got the pirate. It's over.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
@Mike2020 Thanks for reminding everyone Mike plays golf with Trump.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
2 years
Certainly the sign of some sort of illness.
@its_sharl_
Its_Sharl_
2 years
Wow sickest tattoo ever! 🤩 #UFCLondon
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
6 years
@willmenaker People will be judged for the content of the extended cabs, rather than the colour of their chassis.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
UFC fighters reminiscing over the time, 10 years, the company threw them some of the change that fell out of Dana's blackjack wallet... Normal thing. They sold the company for 4b and you got nothing. Utter rubes.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
3 years
I won't be satisfied until Nick Diaz's win over Takanori Gomi is reinstated.
@MMAJunkie
MMA Junkie
3 years
UFC anti-doping policy changes stance on marijuana; positive test no longer violation (via @MMAjunkieJohn )
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
@MaryEmilyOHara This is not politics. This is a bizarre projection.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
@CatherineLenson This is some of the most ridiculous nonsense I have read, on a platform where 99.9% of its content is ridiculous, stupid nonsense.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
5 years
@TheUKMovement1 @Ciara87C @RoastedReast I hope you're sitting down... I've some news.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
7 years
"He's playing mind games." No, that's McGregor's cardio for real. Boxing is hard work.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
6 months
@KinoHyperborea @TeamsterSOB You sound like you're banned from numerous local businesses.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
6 years
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
3 years
@willmenaker Perhaps they could learn to code.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 months
If I were involved in a custody dispute, I would simply not talk about beating someone like my kids into a live mic at a press conference.
@MMAFighting
MMA Fighting
4 months
Neil Magny: Ian Machado Garry trash talk was used in my custody battle, but no ill will toward him
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
2 months
@DavidEggert00 @crainsdetroit Oh no, not the predatory lenders of last resort!
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
@ByYourLogic Add tweets to the list of things cops are afraid of. We should give them more and bigger guns IMO.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
3 years
@TrishaThadani This is very prudent. One time my neighbour smoked an entire weed and I nearly died from the second hand smoke.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
5 years
It is totally awesome that 20 years after Columbine, the discussion is exactly the same and people are talking about banning fucking video games. Our persistence as a species seems like an accident at best.
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@ByYourLogic Guy who loves to tweet himself into a panic attack thinks everyone else wastes too much time when not hawked over by some worthless middle-manager. A modern classic.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
6 years
@_harry_tuttle_ @burgerkrang Happy to report that the only Kid Rock lyrics I know are "ba dang ba dang diggy" and somesuch.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
7 years
"Anderson Silva wasn't actually good" is a really roundabout way of saying you started watching MMA in 2013.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
9 years
Oh my god, who do I thank for this Arlovsky GIF? http://t.co/KkG3rwgyLR
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Derek
2 years
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
@TorontoStar $75 on Uber tells me they don't go anywhere. This person's life seems pretty limited and I don't see the point in getting upset with how they spend such a meager sum of money. This is embarrassing, using this person as a hate magnet for engagement.
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@ByYourLogic One of the only times I laughed at a Dana White comment, he described Tito Ortiz along the lines of "he's not even the smartest guy in the room when he's alone."
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
@Seamus_Malek It's cool that people are starving and can't afford insulin but some random dude with no shot can casually spend 10 million to poll below the margin of error.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
3 years
You made record profits last year, without live gates. How stupid do you think I am?
@BloodyElbow
Bloody Elbow
3 years
UFC COO claims illegal streamers are taking money out of fighters’ pockets
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
6 months
@BongoDrum932913 @ByYourLogic You don't think they have 'tutors' for that?
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
USADA will practically invent new science to protect Jon Jones from a positive test for an anabolic and then mercilessly punishes Kelvin Gastelum for smoking weed (AKA being cool).
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
3 years
@maplecocaine You could balance this out by hiring more women to drone them!
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
@MaxRose4NY Thanks for carrying a rifle around the middle east.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
2 months
If your response to Chael Sonnen telling a story isn't "hey, look at the liar lying to everybody" you probably aren't smart enough to give consent, and should have a minder at all times watching over you.
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@DustinPoirier @daire_nugent Nothing wrong with camping the Conor respawn point.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
5 years
If you can't appreciate what Jose Aldo has given us then fuck you. Just fuck you.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
6 months
@willmenaker We're still calculating how evil the lesser evil is. This is so grim.
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DANA WHITE: I can't be scammed. ALSO DANA WHAT: yeah, this is a great photo.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 months
Turns out the loser stink of the common MMA fan is too much for even a tenured commentator. Calling them the lowest common denominator is undeservedly charitable.
@mma_frenzy
MMA Frenzy
4 months
🚨| Jon Anik expresses his frustration and even hints retirement from UFC commentary amid fan reaction to him thinking that Dricus Du Plessis rightfully won at UFC 297. 😬 [ @AnikFlorianPod ] #MMA #UFC
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@Teslaconomics LMAO you marks will believe anything.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
@politico You're doing an irony, right?
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
@MattHennessey Stay sitting down, the next few weeks are going to be mind-blowing.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
@willmenaker It's unfortunate that simply assuming the worst is effectively prophetic.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
3 years
lol so you *are* anti-vax.
@funkmasterMMA
Aljamain Sterling
3 years
This push is getting out of hand! I feel bad for the international fighters. Hopefully they can figure out a work around loophole or they’re pretty much stuck with an ultimatum.
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@lthomasnews One might say it's a slap in the face.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
4 years
@willmenaker Big Structural Bailing.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
2 years
But who's buying?
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
3 years
@willmenaker These dorks think if they just follow the rules hard enough, fate will intercede or something. It's delusion. Or completely disingenuous and they want this dystopia.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
2 years
@willmenaker That was pitch perfect, just damn.
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
3 years
@verge "Culture."
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
6 years
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@ricketyoldshack
Derek
3 years
@cagepotatomma "My boy would assault the shit out of that fighter's wife" is quite the comeback.
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