@lyzl Who are you trying to convince?

@lyzl I forgot crows feet too

@lyzl That's like a middle aged dream.

@lyzl Pretty great deal if the cat is chipping in on rent

@lyzl There are cats that help pay the rent?

@lyzl Don’t threaten me with a good time!

@lyzl I wish I could get my cats to help with the rent but other than that…

@lyzl If it comes with a pint of Ben & Jerry's it is basically my ideal lifestyle.

@lyzl I mean swap that bottle of wine for a glass or two of bourbon and dude is describing me.

@lyzl Is this supposed to be an insult? Men really don't understand how much women appreciate not having to be burdened by them.

@lyzl Holy shit you got your cat to pay rent SHOW ME HOW??

@lyzl It’s like my dream life 😎

@lyzl My cats refuse to just clean up after themselves, how is he getting them to pay half the rent? 😆

@lyzl think very carefully about this. who would you rather live with: a cat, or a man who despises women and is insufferable. this is a difficult quandary so take your time

@lyzl Wait, I can make my cats pay rent?!

@lyzl Is your book as good as your tweets? This is one of the most hilarious troll accounts I have seen in a while. Following.

@lyzl Lyz Lenz as been unlucky in love, so she wants you to be unlucky in love too. Misery loves company.

@lyzl Like, where do I sign up?

@lyzl