Turns out the most difficult stain to remove from bed linens is actually shame. http://t.co/nVlKb3KWfA.

I have to write 4 pages in 3 hours, but at least I'm not deployed in Iraq. http://t.co/XKAp5fFuLI.

The only relative I want to see at my door is Papa John. http://t.co/tuI8LRlG.

http://t.co/YpPJUtc3 "I nailed that wood so hard I came. " - Carpenter who really enjoys his job.

http://t.co/dbRuttDx I forget. What's that Mexican dish called with rice, chicken, beans, guacamole, cheese and salsa?.