Ivan Mehta
@IndianIdle
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Consumer tech reporter @TechCrunch Pitches: im @ivanmehta .com. Send tips to Signal:ivan.42
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Joined June 2009
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Pinned Tweet
Late professional update: I'm now writing for
@TechCrunch
on consumer tech. So if you know about companies building secret projects and features send me DM or email me at im
@ivanmehta
.com.
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Akshay Kumar is already in the studio, shooting Mission Shakti movie with Rakesh Roshan's Koi Mil Gaya computer.
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Almost there guys. Government is silently showing support. Well done.
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I recently watched Fleabag, and I'm obsessed with Phoebe Waller-Bridge's expressions. So here's a thread of GIFs I made.
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When you want to create a campaign against Microsoft, but the influencer list is in an Excel file.
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Date: I always keep subtitles on while watching Netflix.
Me, trying to impress her: Indistinct chatter.
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Shitposting Twitter got their shit together to build tools and formats to help people within a week. But politicians are still shitposting.
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Staying at home can be really boring. Plus, everyone needs a bit of distraction. So, I'm tweeting a continuous thread of free resources: Books, websites with free subscriptions, videos, audiobooks, and tools to explore stuff.
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Yeah, even we can't believe.
Really honoured to be the Chief Guest at ISRO for the recent celebrations of the World Space Week. I can’t believe one of India’s finest organisations chose me to address them. Truly a big moment of my life - my own moon landing!
#isro
#chetanbhagat
#worldspaceweek
🌓 🚀
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Can’t wait for the action scene where Ajay Devgn uninstalls all 59 Chinese apps.
IT'S OFFICIAL...
#AjayDevgn
to make film on
#GalwanValley
clash... The film - not titled yet - will narrate the story of sacrifice of 20
#Indian
army men, who fought the
#Chinese
army... Cast not finalized... Ajay Devgn FFilms and Select Media Holdings LLP will produce the film.
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People: We want phones with big batteries
Energizer: Hold my red bull
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Vivek Oberoi looks like the wax statue of Narendra Modi at Lonavala wax museum.
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It’s 2020. Rafael Nadal wins the French Open. Somethings are still normal.
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Indians when they see a WhatsApp forward which has UNESCO in it.
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Here to acknowledge the genius of Fardeen Khan who's showing a Maharashtra license to a US cop.
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Everything everywhere all at once
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Said "Doston" three times in a sentence and now I am a Hindi tech YouTuber.
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Modiji is the original creator of Guess the gibberish.
Comes on TV at 8 PM, says something for half an hour, and the country keeps guessing for weeks.
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Who called it Aadhaar card and not the card against humanity?
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You either die a hero, or live long enough to join your society's managing committee.
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Bars in India really need to understand that it's 2019, and quotes like "Drink Beer, Save Water" and "My bloodtype is Beer" are not hip anymore.
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Hotstar:
You just finished True Detective Season 3 Episode 4
Next: Ye Rishta Kya Kehlata hai
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Telegram will tweet memes but won’t make a feature to easily disable “Xyz joined Telegram!”
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Rule 35 of the internet: If a thing happens in India, there's a Bhojpuri song on it.
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Remember when you were giving your exams and suddenly realised there’s only 20 minutes left, and started writing whatever came to your mind?
That was Game of Thrones season 8.
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People on dating apps, no one wants to eat your french fries. Kha lo tum.
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Security of Indian government and the official website is often a joke. But the people who find the bugs in those websites are seen either as criminals or they get no response. My story on how Indian White hat hackers are treated as third-grade citizens
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Guy: I beat the shit out of students
Delhi Police:
Another guy: Comrad
Delhi Police: YAHI HAI. PAKDO
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How do you know a person is watching Dark?
They’ll tell you. And then tell you again after 33 years.
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*Google AI talking to Uber driver in India*
AI: Hi, where are you?
Driver: I am on the location where are you?
AI: I am on the location. Where are you?
Driver: I am also on the location. Where are you.
... They live happily ever after on location
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Mitron, new vaccination hashtag is
#YeNikkeNikkeShots
Prime Minister
@narendramodi
will address the nation on the COVID-19 situation at 8:45 this evening.
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Netflix production team: We made this great show.
Netflix UI team: Bury this fucking deep and put the stupidest show on the banner.
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Crazy pricing by Xiaomi on TVs
Mi TV 4A 32 inch (720p) - Rs 13,999
Mi TV 4A 43 inch (1080p) - Rs 22,999
Mi TV 4 55 inch (4K HDR) - Rs 39,999
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Great partnership building by Jadhav and Dhoni. Winning this in 64th over easily.
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In the next Mission Impossible stunt, Tom Cruise will try and run Twitter.
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Need to first develop an AI that prevents people from using Comic Sans.
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Life is disappointing, but not disappointing enough to use Facebook or WhatsApp's story feature.
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Prateek Kuhad releases songs so coffee shops have something to play in the background.
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While India's win is a historic milestone, it also showed us the grit, passion, perseverance, and determination of all people who had to use SonyLIV.
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See, it’s easier to defend at Old Trafford when you don’t have Young and Smalling in your team.
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Xiaomi says it'll provide a toggle to turn off data collection in incognito mode for Mi Browser and Mint browser.
Why would I need to turn a switch for private browsing in incognito mode? Just turn off data collection. This is dumb.
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Indian shopkeepers just love two-factor authentication:
Shopkeeper: Kya chahiye?
Me: Bhaiya ek maggi dena.
Shopkeeper: Ek maggi?
Me: Haan, ek maggi.
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Poster making meeting:
“We need to accurately describe a movie about badminton.”
“There’s only one way to do it. A tricolor wristband.”
*everyone goes wild*
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Crush: Hi
Me:
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Flight attendant: Is there a doctor on this flight?
Dad: *nudging me* that should've been you
Me: Not now Dad
Dad: Not asking for a tech reporter, are they?
Attendant: That’s right. But what’s a good phone under ₹20,000?
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This is the official number which can be used for Twitter for SMS: +91-9248948837
Link your phone number with your account first to get it working.
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Aur kahi nahi to Android mai to ban gaya.
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Could've just called it Karan Arjun
Zack Snyder Wanted 'Batman v Superman' to Be Called 'Son of Sun and Knight of Night'
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You mean email?
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Me: Hi, Vodafone, I am not getting proper network.
Vodafone: Sir, 50 GB data free.
Me: But, I cant make calls.
Vodafone: Sir, Vodafone Play free.
Me: Networ...
Vodafone: Amazon Prime also
Me: I am porting.
Vodafone: Sir company aapke naam aaj se.
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Sites/sheets to check Covid-19 resources in India:
(Bed/oxy/plasma/med/food)
(Bed/blood/plasma)
(Bed/oxy/plasma/med/food/ local info)
(Meds/local info/doctors/oxy)
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First day as Netflix subtitle writer
Colleague: Hi, I'm Jack.
Me: [Ominous music plays]
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Throwback to simpler times when Honey Singh's song with the hook "Weed pila de sajna" was named SATAN
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Defamation case for anyone who criticises logo sizes.
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Due to my lack of social life, I actually tried being a friend with an AI. Here is my experience of one month – a story I have been working on for a long time.
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England won the World Cup through a rule book. Book cricket hi khel lete.
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WhatsApp forwards about social media rules have started flowing in. I mean wtf.
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Aleksandr Akimov: Comrade Dyatlov, the power is too low.
Dyatlov:
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Held a mic for 5 seconds and now I have an Amazon Prime special coming out.
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