Drew Gooden
@drewisgooden
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more importantly though I put together a charity auction to benefit
@ThePCRF
. you can check that out here and place a bid on something if you want. the auction will run for the next week and then I'll match the total amount to double our donation
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People are acting like a temporary quarantine is the end of the world. It's not. Avoiding large crowds doesn't mean you can't go outside. Take a walk, go on a bike ride, hotbox the whip, ask shawty to drop it low for you (after she washes her hands). You can still live your life.
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Birth certificates have gotta be the most pointless documents. Why do I have to prove that I was born? I’m literally right here.
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Imagine being so disconnected from reality that you get this excited about pretending to work in a restaurant for two hours
lmfaoooooooo i fucking hate millionaires are you kidding me?
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i’ve never opened up about this before but in 2016 i bought Vine for 44 billion dollars and then it shut down 12 days later. so i know exactly what elon is going through right now.
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Colin Kaepernick was villainized and ridiculed for kneeling during a song. Quiet acts of protest don’t work if the people you’re protesting to don’t want to listen.
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Jesus Christ not again
YouTuber Jake Paul is launching a platform to teach people how to be entrepreneurs and live financially free. It costs $19.99 per month
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Dude you GOTTA watch this show. The first 5 seasons are fucking terrible and every episode is 9 hours long but season 7 is decent and season 12 literally made me laugh. You can only watch it on prime video and every episode costs $4
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We just wanted to apologize. After a long 48 hours of restless filming and touring then meeting thousands of fans with no sleep we were exhausted by the end of our show. Our true apologies ❤️ we are sincerely sorry.
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what
Hello Bay Area. It feels hella nice out here (shoutout to Drew Gooden)
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I gotta be honest guys, the only reason I still make YouTube videos is to fund my rent addiction. I am absolutely obsessed with paying rent every month and if I don’t get my fix I might die.
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Staring at the Netflix logo with bae 😍😍😍
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This is what I picture in my head whenever radio stations say they have “the best mix of 80s, 90s, and today”. It’s been today for 21 years. You can’t keep getting away with this.
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shut up bitch
The only popular tweets anymore are when people quote other tweets and make fun of them. Time to rethink my strategy.
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Oh my god dude we get it, you've had sex, you can stop tweeting about it now
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I am so disappointed in Phoebe. There are millions of hungry kids out there who would have loved to eat that guitar. And now no one can eat it. I can’t stop crying.
Why did this woman, Phoebe Bridgers, destroy her guitar on SNL?
I mean, I didn't care much for the song either, but that seemed extra.
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I stand by what I said. If you even have an INKLING OF DEPRESSIVE BEHAVIOR, stay the FUCK away from tube tops thank you
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In light of recent events, my wife and I will be spending the holiday weekend trying to steal the Declaration of Independence
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Excuse me
@Delta
but this is outrageous. I just got sucked through the toilet hole in one of your aircrafts and am now hurtling through the sky, can I get my money back? This never happens on Southwest.
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YouTube can get pretty stressful sometimes but getting messages like this from fans makes it all worth it ❤️
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.
@AppleSupport
any plans to combine these two emojis? 😔🤠 I would love to be able to convey to people that even though I am sad, I am still a cowboy. Please fix ASAP
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A year ago today I got married and it was the only time I’ve ever cried. Isn’t that crazy? I had never cried before this and I definitely haven’t cried since. Anyway happy birthday to my marriage.
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1/
x is an awesome letter, one of the coolest letters in fact! I just turned 8 years old and I think the letter x is the most coolest thing there is. anyway, my dad made me chicken nuggets so I can’t finish the thread right now
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oh so elon can spend $44 billion on twitter but he couldn’t have forked over like 200 bucks to save the jeremy renner app? unreal, dude
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Last April a girl commented on one of my vines. She lived 2000 miles away. Now we are engaged & live in the same house. All because of
@vine
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I remade that awful scene from the new Kim Possible movie:
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Stranger Things is so unrealistic lol, there’s monsters in it? Yeah that’s not real lol. Plus if this all happened in the 80s then why are we just hearing about it now? I’m not buying it. I think I’ll stick to shows about REAL life like the Property Brothers and CSI: Miami
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This dude made up a fake conversation about a stranger giving him a dog he already owned and it has almost 400k likes. Twitter really is something
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Saw a car today that had “I fuck hookers” scratched into the side. Seems like kind of a weird thing to brag about but okay
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just had the most intense text exchange with my boss 😳 *100% real*
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twitter has spoken! he may have won the battle (made like $75 million playing in the NBA) but I’ve won the war (my profile says i’m official) 😈
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Gonna tell my kids I don’t even know who this guy is. I’ve never met him, I don’t know his name, and he’s definitely not their dad
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Absolutely disgusting that someone has to get “sworn in” to become the president. Swearing is never okay! You’re all going to hell.
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can you guys keep sending me this I haven’t seen it yet
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here’s why everyone is WRONG about twitter changing its name to x being “a baffling choice” and “not a smart thing to do”: a thread
🧵
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just saw someone with “I solemnly swear that I am up to no good” on their license plate.
sir, this is a public road. you don’t get to be up to no good here. you don’t get to be a little goofball. my life is in your hands. manage your mischief at home.
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Y’all out here making friends with ur number neighbors meanwhile I’m MARRYING mine. Yep this is real and we’re getting married in Vegas tomorrow 💍❤️
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People always send me screenshots like this because google seems to think I am Drew Gooden, the former NBA player, but surprisingly not all of the information is wrong. Here’s my corrected version.
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I've been working on some new memes, let me know what you guys think.
I hope this doesn't "break the internet" 😂
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relax 🙄 it ony a movie
Cool, Max, cool. One note. This movie was released in 2017, and it depicts an event that took place in 1994.
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Normalize going to a different dentist the day before your actual dentist so your real dentist just thinks you’re really good at brushing your teeth
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okay so this might not be the best time to say this but I still haven’t gotten my $47 back
Jeremy Renner's Ex-Wife Says He Put Gun in Mouth and Threatened to Kill Her
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sometimes CAPTCHA makes you solve one of those 1000 piece puzzles that's all sky and other times you just have to tell them you're not a robot and they take your word for it. who's in charge of this
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they should film horror movies during the daytime so they're not so scary :)
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dropped my phone in the toilet and it won't turn on
end 🧵
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the ACE Family: *continually does something that is directly hurting someone else*
also the ACE Family: we’re just minding our own business 😊
I don’t think that’s how minding your own business works
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I’m 25 why do back to school commercials still give me anxiety
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Back in my day I had to fly 2000 miles for a woman I met on Vine. Kids these days have it so easy smh
Man flies 650 miles for first date with woman he met on TikTok
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I was so excited for the pepsi halftime show, what the hell is this?? wore my special shirt for nothing :(
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the only value of a twitter blue checkmark now is that people might mistake you for someone who is actually notable. if you get rid of every other checkmark, then the twitter blue checkmark literally means nothing. they’re actually devaluing their own product by doing this.
On April 1st, we will begin winding down our legacy verified program and removing legacy verified checkmarks. To keep your blue checkmark on Twitter, individuals can sign up for Twitter Blue here:
Organizations can sign up for
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Here's why I will NOT be making an account on the Hive app that everyone is talking about this week.
A thread 🧵 1/?
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Jeremy Renner requests child support reduction due to coronavirus pandemic
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just found out mascots aren’t real. apparently there’s a guy in there. what the fuck.
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I know this sounds hyperbolic but this might be the best video i’ve ever watched on youtube
For the past twenty years, four notes have constantly been playing on Disney Channel, but no one knows who wrote them. Let's figure it out. Watch Disney Channel's Theme: A History Mystery now:
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Youtuber who makes clickbait titles that entice no one
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So proud of Logan Paul. For someone to go from not knowing that suicide is bad, to knowing that it actually is bad, in the short time span of only 3 weeks is so impressive. Props to you big guy.
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2018 was an amazing year, so many cool things to reflect on:
-turned 25
-stayed a virgin
-turned 26
-got kissed
-lost all my money
-turned 27
-had 3 birthdays
-went to jail
Here’s to an even better 2017!
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Man I just can’t stop thinking about how stupid babies are. They can’t talk, they have no life experiences, and most of them haven’t even finished high school. Babies are so dumb.
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twitter is just everyone taking turns saying the absolute dumbest shit imaginable and I spend 3 hours a day on it
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sorry I haven’t posted a video in two months i’ve been at the dentist
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What a legend. I can’t even imagine having the strength to accomplish everything he did while battling cancer. Life is so consistently unfair.
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Really excited for whoever stole my amazon box with exactly one (1) hot glue gun in it. They’re about to have the time of their lives.
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this is awesome. you can post photos on twitter now! very excited to test out this new feature (so far so good)
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a roller coaster of a morning for sure. thanks to everyone who stuck by me through it all. i'll never forget this.
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omg I did not expect to win this at all. joke’s on you i’m retiring now 😈
he gives us the facts, so we're giving him a
#streamys
award for Commentary!! way to go
@drewisgooden
👏
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getting comments like these almost simultaneously drives me crazy. "post more!!!" but also "every video needs to be original and groundbreaking"
i've been making youtube videos for five years. eventually you run out of shit to talk about!
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Holy shit I just got absolutely OWNED on this 6-year old tweet. I feel like such an idiot
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you guys sleep on the same bed every night?? 🤢 couldn’t be me. I signed up for a mattress delivery service that mails me a new mattress every day so I never have to sleep in my own germs.
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Thank you so much for 11 quarters of a million subscribers. It is my most important milestone yet and in honor of this I will be deleting my channel.
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*taking 3 ibuprofen instead of just 2* i’m here for a good time not a long time
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Pennsylvania won Florida! But Texas won Nevada. Arizona’s winning Delaware! But Georgia won North Carolina. New York just took the lead! But now Wisconsin’s winning Michigan.
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I like my women like I like my coffee - made out of beans
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I did not anticipate becoming an olivia rodrigo stan and yet, here we are
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