💉Josh Rubin, MD 🩺
@DrSandman11
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Anesthesiologist, father of 5 ginger #MedTwitterKids . Don’t give anesthesia based on posts. Correlation ≠ causation 💉 @DrSandman11 on 🟦⛅️, et al
Maine🦞 ➡️ New Jersey
Joined March 2009
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It began with the forging of the Great Rings.
Three were given to the Elves, immortal, wisest, fairest of all beings.
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Anyone who is unwilling to disclose their vaccine status has disclosed their vaccine status
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The anesthesiologist when it’s Friday afternoon and they let the med student close
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mRNA vaccines: cause myocarditis in 1 in 50,000 cases
SARS-CoV-2: cause mortality in 1 in 62.5 cases
Math is hard.
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[reviewing charts]
Patient birth year: 1981
Patient age: 42
Me: “No, that can’t be right”
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Personally, I’m a “space force” single issue voter, so this really speaks to me
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I don’t know who still needs to hear this but the N95 goes *under* the surgical mask
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Patient pro tip: don’t be shady about your substance use with your anesthesiologist. I promise I’m not a narc; I just need to know for… reasons
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Knowing the locations of the least-used bathrooms in the hospital is an essential skill
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Orthopedic surgeon:
Me:
Orthopedic surgeon:
Me:
Orthopedic surgeon:
Me:
Orthopedic surgeon:
Me:
Orthopedic surgeon:
Me: “See that part of the heart squigglegram? Means your patient is actively having an MI.”
Orthopedic surgeon: “But there is a fracture.”
#MedTwitter
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If I’d gotten into medical school and it was discovered that I fabricated my biography, my MCAT score, my GPA, the college I graduated from, and premed activities, there’s no way I’d be allowed to continue to be a medical student.
This is an obvious subtweet.
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Just intubated my first two presumed-positive
#coronavirus
patients... some thoughts:
- preO2 with FiO2 NRB mask for 5 mins
- PPE: hat, N95, face mask, gown, gloves, shoe covers
- drugs prepared outside
- RSI, no bagging, glidescope intubation
#COVIS19
#MedTwitter
🦠
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Healthcare workers heading back in for another shift
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Hey Siri, show me the most literally tone deaf thing ever conceived
The first Iowa Wave of the season 👋
Players and fans turn to wave to the Children's Hospital behind the stadium.
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One statistic that should influence the vaccine-hesitant is that more than 97% of doctors are vaccinated against covid.
When’s the last time 97% of doctors (across all races, genders, generations, sexual orientations, political affiliations and hair color) agree on ANYTHING?
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He didn’t need CPR from the vaccine you fucking fucks
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Why isn’t “keeps me out of the ICU or dead” a desirable outcome
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I don’t know who needs to know this, but if you’ve ever had surgery, you’ve likely been given fentanyl
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“I trust my immune system”
~People who have never heard of autoimmune diseases
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My doorbell just emailed me to tell me its battery is low.
The future is weird.
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As a non-Christian, gotta say that Christofacism scares the everliving fuck out of me
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I don’t know who needs to hear this, almost two years into this, but the BLUE side of the surgical mask goes on the OUTSIDE and the WHITE side goes on the INSIDE 😷
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Tell me you don’t know how infectious diseases work without telling me you don’t know how infectious diseases work
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Me explaining to the orthopedic surgeon why this squiggle on the EKG means that the patient can’t have their elective surgery today
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The (14 m/o) baby is getting mad between bites of pizza. Not because she doesn’t like it, but because every time she swallows she no longer has pizza in her mouth and this ANGERS HER 🍕
#MedTwitterKids
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“I won’t take the vaccine because of a 1 in a million chance something bad might happen”
“Why should I be scared of covid? It has a 99.9% survival rate”
They really need to be teaching statistics in primary school
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I just threw out an N95 after a single use like some sort of billionaire
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2 MG MIDAZOLAM
50 MCG FENTANYL
100 MG LIDOCAINE
150 MG PROPOFOL
100 MG SUCCINYLCHOLINE
2% SEVOFLURANE
100 MCG PHENYLEPHRINE
50 MG ROCURONIUM
50 MCG FENTANYL
10 MG METOCLOPRAMIDE
4 MG ONDANSETRON
50 MCG FENTANYL
200 MG SUGAMMADEX
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I may have just convinced a vaccine-hesitant patient and their spouse to go get vaccinated 🤭
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Mama don’t let your babies grow up to be c̶o̶w̶b̶o̶y̶s̶ doctors who order preop pregnancy tests on 80 year-old patients
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Oh man, why did I waste all that time and money going to medical school and residency when I could have just done some Online Research
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A pretty good rule of thumb in life is
"don't be memorable to your anesthesiologist"
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If you won’t take the vaccine because it’s not “fully approved,” boy let me tell you about monoclonal antibodies, hydroxychloroquine and ivermectin
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Cesarean sections are weird… one of the few surgeries where the patient is completely awake
On one side of the drape: quiet conversation between parturient and partner… other side: Major Abdominal Surgery and oh a baby
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I drug people when they’re not looking and my buddy comes and stabs them for a while. Then when he’s done stabbing, I ask other people to watch them and sometimes they throw up.
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If you’re a 4th year medical student and you’ve already matched in some non-anesthesia or surgical field, please don’t take offense and please know I mean this with the utmost respect and due deference, but please please please get the fuck out of my operating room and go home
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I just asked the surgeon I’m with today about his thoughts on the Kendrick/Drake beef and he understandably said “What the fuck are you talking about?”
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Listing fentanyl as a Schedule 1 drug is an extremely stupid idea and would have far-reaching unintended negative consequences if ever enacted.
Sincerely,
An anesthesiologist
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Can we kill “6 feet apart”?
It’d be one thing if SARS-Cov-2 just spread via droplets… but we know it has aerosol transmission.
If you’re in a movie theater in the back row and there’s only one other person in the front row smoking a cigarette… would you be able to smell it?
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You’ve heard of elf on a shelf... but have you heard of
You’ve heard of elf on a shelf... but have you heard of
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I don’t know who needs to hear this but stuttering ≠ dementia ffs
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[on call]
don't say it
don't say it
don't say it
don't say it
don't say it
don't say it
don't say it
don't say it
don't say it
don't say it
don't say it
don't say it
don't say it
don't say it
don't say it
don't say it
don't say it
don't say it
Me: “It sure is quiet!”
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As a medical provider I haven’t even been asked to help out administer vaccines, and no one I know has either
What are we doing
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Hey
@Jack
@Twitter
@TwitterSafety
, please add a “Coronavirus/COVID-19 Misinformation” category for reporting harmful tweets
#MedTwitter
, let’s get on this!
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@goldengateblond
@mattgaetz
“Over-educated” like, “anything more than a high school diploma”?
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Sarah Palin is trending… I’m just going to assume she’s dating Pete Davidson
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Did they fall asleep *with* propofol or *from* propofol
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What’s a medical term that sounds really scary but isn’t?
1) dead space
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Patient, waking up: “We’re done??”
Me: “Yeah! You fell asleep, missed it!”
Patient: “How did it go?”
Me: “The other doctor will talk to you when you’re more awake. Anything we tell you right now you may not remember… including that.”
Patient: “… we’re done??”
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It’s only Versed if it comes from the Verséd region of France; otherwise it’s just a sparkling midazolam.
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It’s not Wordle, it’s propofol
⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️
⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️
⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️
⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️
⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️
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This man is a case study in “smart at one thing doesn’t mean you’re smart at everything”
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A gender reveal party but it’s just you, your partner, and the ultrasonographer
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To be an entry-level anesthesiologist, at minimum:
12 years primary school
4 years undergrad
4 years medical school
4 years residency
(+/- 1 year fellowship)
We are not easily replaced.
Stay home. Wear a mask. Get us some fucking PPE.
#COVID19
#Coronavirus
#MedTwitter
🦠
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If you’re eating anything in a hospital and something falls to the floor, there’s no 5-second rule… it’s gone, man
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Me, a physician:
4 years high school
4 years college
4 years medical school
4 years anesthesiology residency
12 years anesthesia practice
Also me, 10 minutes after taking my evening metoprolol:
“Shit, I can’t remember if I took my metoprolol today”
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Amazing
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To anyone who thinks the nitrogen execution in Alabama is “fine” … just picture how much it would suck holding your breath to death
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You’ve heard of Elf on the Shelf… perhaps you’ve heard of
You’ve heard of Elf on the Shelf… but have you heard of
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“I have a really good immune system”
Yeah? How do you know
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So tired of clinical decisions being made by non-clinical people
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@FoxNews
“Man who rejects medical advice shocked to find out he doesn’t qualify for procedure where you need to strictly follow medical advice”
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When you tell the 4th year med student they can go for the day
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Me: “Four scrambled eggs would be a LOT of eggs to eat in one sitting”
Also me: [eats 22 of these]
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Surgeon: “I’m going to take this patient to the OR for an elective procedure with a new-onset arrhythmia”
ⓘ 𝗧𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗰𝗹𝗮𝗶𝗺 𝗶𝘀 𝗱𝗶𝘀𝗽𝘂𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗯𝘆 𝗮𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘀𝗶𝗮
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Most Orcs For Sauron voters say Aragorn should not be King of Gondor next year: Just 11% support his candidacy, while 61% oppose it, according to our latest poll
Most Republican voters say Nancy Pelosi should not be House speaker next year: Just 11% support her candidacy, while 61% oppose it, according to our latest poll
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Can we *at least* wait until the under-5’s are eligible to be vaccinated before we just up and decide the pandemic is “over”??
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